Knocked Up

No, I am not pregnant.

I came home from a rough day at work to find my son guzzling a liter of Pepsi. I demanded to know how he got that Pepsi. He told me his father bought it for him.

"Yeah, I've been sort of knocked up on Pepsi for awhile."

"Knocked up, huh? Kade, do you even know what 'knocked up' means?"

"Yeah, it means 'drunk', doesn't it?"

"No. No, it doesn't. It means pregnant."

Big pause.

"Ohhhhh. So that means you've been knocked up before, huh Mom?"

**************

Apparently my son has inherited the part of his father's brain that tells (or rather doesn't tell) him that he's asleep. So they both act out their dreams. I don't mean they talk in their sleep, either. They literally act out their dreams, which can be quite comical. Unless it's a fighting dream, in which case, duck and cover.

I have found my husband fast asleep making coffee, doing laundry, giving slideshow presentations to an empty living room... That last one had me rolling. And now my son.

My Kade went down the living room, where his father had fallen asleep on the couch. He picked up a hanger on the way. Chris woke to a tapping at his feet. Kade was mumbling something angrily and shaking that hanger at my Chris. I wasn't there, so I didn't get to see the look on either of their faces, but I bet if I had been there, I'd have peed my pants. Chris finally realized Kade was completely asleep the whole time. He gently asked Kade what he was doing, but Kade would only mumble incoherently. So Chris took him to bed. The next morning, Kade had no recollection of the entire episode. Man, I wished I had been there to see it.

I always tell people that you can call my house anytime, because someone will be up. It's true, too. They may not be awake, but someone will always be up.

Oh Crappy Day

Well, that sucked. Today was a wash with three people calling in sick, one getting testy with me, which I squashed in a no nonsense "I WILL NOT be dealing with drama today!!!!" attitude and a customer that threatened to call the BBB over a product THEY broke. Fun!

I don't like confronting people that I know I can verbally whip. I don't. It's sad and I always feel bad. On the other hand, I will not tolerate insubordination. If you confront me, it's game on. Do your job. It's not hard. Just do it.

So, sometimes, it feels like when you are at your moment when you feel like you will pull your hair out, an angel comes along to brighten your day. This kid walked in and asked for me. I glanced up, telling him I'd be right with him. I noticed his eyes. Such beautiful baby blue honest eyes, that spoke of such innocence and good-heartedness. And then I realized it was my cousin. I hadn't seen him in awhile, my he'd grown! And for some reason, I had to smile.

You don't see that much anymore. I mean I am an antisocial person. I admit it. I can be fine in my home by myself for days on end, never thinking twice of it. I don't want other people around. Mostly because the people I get to see on a day to day basis are assholes and lazy losers. But this one kid immediately made me feel better, only because I know how much of a good person he is. Man, I wish everyone were like him. I wouldn't be antisocial if everyone were as thoughtful and genuine as he is.

So, in the middle of my horrendous day, Levi made me smile.

For Heather

Normally, when I read others' blogs, I might leave a comment here or there, but generally I don't bring their stuff on my blog. Unless it's a tag game sort of thing. I check in with a few. I admit, I've lost touch with a lot of people that I used to read daily. It does break my heart, that a lot of them have gone private or missing. I've gone missing from time to time, too. But still there are a few that I silently check on.

So I went to Heather's blog. I was so angry at what some sad little pathetic peon of a person wrote to her in email. Livid. I'm not even going to get into that.

What I do want to say is that, you know what? This is what I have come to know...

Dear Heather,

I realize that you and I haven't been the closest bloggers out there, but we have still sort of kept in touch. And from all that I have read, from all that I know of you, you happen to be the sweetest, kindest girl I know. It pains me to see someone trying to hurt you. You don't deserve that. Even in your lowest moments, I still imagined you softly smiling. There will always be assholes trying to get at you. Trust me, I know.

But if you read nothing else, read this: You are not alone. You have great friends, whether they be bloggers or real-life, you have people that will be there for you when you need it. You aren't alone. And the painful experiences you've gone through? Some women out there have been through similar ones as well. They may not be brave enough to let the world see their pain, but you were. You were that brave. Your words may have helped them along and you didn't even know it. So you keep writing whatever your little heart desires, babe. I'll be here, silently checking in now and again. You know if you ever need anything, just email. Always keep smiling.

Ari