Honoring Gary Rovinski

I can't sleep before these missions. I don't know what it is, but I end up just laying in bed all night. I am writing this now in sheer and utter exhaustion, physically and emotionally. This one should have been completely similar to the last mission. Same church, same town, same staging area. And when it came time to honor Petty Officer First Class Gary Rovinski, it was the same. The Patriot Guard Riders were there in full force. Local people came to stand on their lawns with flags, honoring him when we rode out to the cemetery. Some people even lined the highway.

But for me, it was not the same. Kade and I had gone to the store to buy teddy bears to present to his daughters from the Patriot Guard. Chris had arranged a condolence card for everyone to sign for the mourning family. He took Kade and I inside to present it to them. I think this is what makes this so much harder for me. I saw Mrs. Rovinski, her eyes... I know those eyes. They're the eyes I see when I look in the mirror each morning. They're the eyes of anyone who has ever lost someone they loved so much.

We came outside. Chris went his way to do his part, I went mine to take pictures of the PGR and to help run water down the line. Or at least, that's what I had intended to do. I got a few feet down the line, snapping shots. I turned around to make sure Kade was behind me, when I saw a reporter racing all along the hearse taking snapshot after snapshot. I had been very cautious in my own shots, that I did NOT get the hearse in the picture. Here he was practically using it as a jungle gym to get better angles and shots. I know I stood there for a few moments in utter shock, I know I felt my eyes begin to well up. That's when I turned away and hurriedly walked back down the line to the water truck. Chris saw me, then pulled me aside. I told him about the guy, but being that he was part of the press, there was nothing anyone could do. But ... how could someone in good conscience DO THAT?! For some reason, it just really hit me hard. I had JUST met the mourning family, then to see a guy being so disrespectful... I had to take a few moments to compose myself. I had Kade fill up coolers with water bottles in order to keep distracted. A few riders came by to offer words of encouragment. I didn't lose it altogether, but it was very hard to keep all that back. It was hard to keep from sobbing. Later in the day, while standing with another rider, she gasped in indignation.

"Look at that creep!" she exclaimed.

I looked over at the church, not surprised in any way. It was the very same reporter standing with his camera at the glass of one of the windows, trying desperately to get a shot of what was going on inside the building.

"That's the guy," I told her.

It was a very long day. The weather alternated between raining and full-on heat. I know everyone was exhausted. We did a twenty mile ride to the cemetery. This time I stood with them. I don't what it is, but the twenty-one gun salute gets me everytime. Even when I know it's coming, it still shakes me to the core when I hear those shots fired.

Afterwards, the VFW had a luncheon for everyone. They did a fabulous job. It was a nice oasis for all the guys that had stood all day. This one just really hit home for me. I can't imagine what the family is going through. My tears are for them, really. If anything, it just makes it even more clear to me. I'm glad I went. I'd do it again in a heartbeat. I hope I don't have to.

God Bless You, Gary Rovinski

Rest In Peace